The Zoo

I gave in. I only have a few more days down under and I wasn't sure if I would see a koala, so I accepted defeat and ventured to the zoo. The zoo here in Sydney is a great way to see the myriad of poisonous creatures that roam around Australia. I wouldn't want to see the Fierce Snake (Australia's most poisonous) out in the wild. There are few things that would make me scream in a high pitched voice and do all sorts of un-manly things like flail as I rud away, but a ridiculously poisonous snake would be one of them. I admired the venomous things from behind plexi-glass, which was fine by me.

The zoo here just had a new baby elephant. Well, one of their elephants had a baby elephant, but you know what I mean. I put that at the top of the list of things to see, right behind koalas. The elephat exhibit was hilarious. I don't have kids but I always like to hear children talking to their parents, and listening to parents skirt around the procreation talk is as entertaining as any prime time sitcom. "Where did the little elephant come from mom?" asks the kid. "From the momma elephant," was the standard reply. Children's curiosity is generally never curbed after the first question, so the kids would press on, "how did it get inside the momma?" This is where most of the parents would point to something, or suggest that it was lunch time. The zoo has taken the liberty of displaying the equivalent of elephant pornography, though, which throws a curveball at the parents. There is a big picture of two elephants making a baby elephant right in front of the exhibit. There is no way you can miss it. Most of the adults that passed had to have a chuckle, but the kids would ask what was going on. The parent of the day went to a couple that passed by and their child, who was probably around 8 or so, asked them what the elephants in the picture were doing and the dad quickly piped in,"they're having sex. You don't need to know about it now, but you'll find out all about it when you're 16." The guys wife hit his arm and quipped at him and he looked at her and said,"lets be serious, shall we, I'm not going to lie to him."

While I was makingmy way around the zoo I realized that Im not that into going to the zoo. It is a great way to see animals without having to dodge them in a car or worry about them eating your picnic basket, but it is always sad to see those animals in their tiny little cages. I stopped by the seal show to cheer myself up a bit. Those crazy seals can put a smile on anyones face. They can balance balls, jump and touch stuff with their nose, and wave those flippers to say "hi." Oh, those seals, they just love to entertain. They are a lot better performers than the spider monkeys. Those lazy bastards just lounged around.

Feeling satisfied with my tourist ventures for the day I hopped on the ferry and headed home. It is a nice way to end the day. You have to take the ferry from Sydney across the harbor to the zoo and on the ride back you get a great view of the skyline, Sydney harbor, and the Opera House. Even though I already have too many pictures of the Opera House I snapped a few more. Everyone else was doing it, so I gave in to the tourist peer pressure. Maybe I can sell one of my pictures to a postcard company.