The Happy Hour Shower

Apparently in Pueblo, Colorado they have what they call the "Happy Hour" shower. Nearly everyday around 5 o'clock or so a torrential storm dumps for anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour. I like to think of myself as a knowledgeable person and I have an alright grasp of weather patterns and meteorology, but the daily dump of rain just seems asinine to me. How does that happen? It is literally like clock work. Today I got caught in the rain again. For some reason I felt that I could outsmart nature, but I was mistaken.

Today was our second day staying in Pueblo. We had a rest day so we did not ride, but the staff still had to work. My tasks for the day were to wash the vans and redistribute items between the vans. I washed the vans in the morning heat. The sun scorches out here. I am used to the thick layer of smog and toxic gases that cover Los Angeles County and tame the powerful sun. Here in the fresh air the sun has no pollution to work it's way through so one hundred percent of those ultra-violet rays break through and sear your skin like a bug under a magnifying glass. After cleaning the vans I came back to the motel for my mid day nap. When I awoke from my nap I looked out the window and saw an ominous black cloud off in the distance. I didn't think much of it and made my way outside to finish my work for the day. From the time it took me to put on a shirt and get out side the cloud had positioned itself right over the motel parking lot, and my workspace.

"It was sunny this morning without a cloud in the sky, there is no way that it is going to rain." I assured myself, clearly disregarding my newly acquired experience of the the Happy Hour Shower. Sure enough, I open the van door and simultaneously the thunder cracks and the heavens pour out a small ocean in seconds. This phenomenon will never cease to amaze me. Now that I was thoroughly convinced that it was going to rain I jumped in the van and slammed the door. I waited and the rain let up after about 15 minutes or so. Who the hell invented freakish weather like that and what were they thinking?

I have a random thought to share today; why are handicapped toilets so much higher than non handicapped toilets? I don't mean to offend, but I don't think that the average handicapped person is seven feet tall. I also want to know who has a breakfast buffet with just side dishes? The buffet this morning had sausage, bacon, eggs, and hash browns. No pancakes, waffles, french toast, omelets, nothing that would constitute a main breakfast course. What is that?

The Royal Gorge

Have you ever been to the world's highest suspension bridge? Well I have. I am now a member of an elite group of people who have walked across the Royal Gorge on the world's highest suspension bridge. I must say that I feel like I am a better person now. The grass seems somehow greener, water tastes sweeter, and I have a bit of a spring to my step. Ok, I am being sarcastic, but I did walk across the Royal Gorge Bridge today, and it is the world's highest suspension bridge. The bridge spans across the gorge a staggering 1,053 feet above the Arkansas River. I must say that when I was looking at the brochure I didn't think that 1,053 feet off of the ground was that impressive, but when I was standing on the bridge looking straight down at a nearly quarter mile gap between myself and the ground, I was taken aback. To add to the vertigo one feels at such dizzying heights, the wind whips through the canyon and they let cars drive across the bridge, which already has people walking as well as my dumb ass riding my bicycle on it. At times it was a bit unnerving having the bridge swaying to and fro, but I figured that the bridge has been there for 80 years so it will most likely be here for another hour while I am on it.

While a couple of the riders and I sat having ice cream overlooking the gorge, Hans, a Swiss college professor, asked in his literal, Swiss way,"what is the purpose of this bridge? It is only a couple of miles either way to get around the gorge so there is no direct need for the bridge." I looked at Bob, who is from Seattle and fully understands the American way of "If it means we are gonna break a record than build that shit" and we both gave Hans the "why wouldn't you build the highest suspension bridge in the world?" reply. He did not understand and to be honest, neither do I, but it is there and we all paid $12 to see it, so I guess it serves an economical purpose if nothing else.My gripe for the day is Bighorn Sheep Canyon. I love wildlife in their natural environment as I think I have mentioned before I have been vigilantly trying to spy anything I can. Well, today we rode through Bighorn Sheep Canyon so me, being the naive city boy that I am, thought that this would be a perfect chance to see some bighorn sheep. I rode 25 miles through this misnomered canyon spending absolutely no time looking at the road ahead while I scanned each and every square inch for a bighorn sheep. I saw exactly zero. Goose egg, bagel, zip, zilch, nada one freaking bighorn sheep. I am currently drafting a letter to the Governor of Colorado for falsely naming "Bighorn Sheep" Canyon. My suggestion for the new name is "Don't Get Your Hopes Up Because You Probably Won't See Any Wild Animals in This Canyon So Just Keep On Keepin On" canyon. We'll see how that pans out.

The Continental Divide

Monarch pass goes uphill for 9 miles, gains 5,000 feet of elevation and tops out at 11,312 feet above sea level.  Today, we rode up and over the summit of the Monarch Pass on our bicycles.  The summit also marks the Continental Divide, which separates the Pacific from the Atlantic side of the continent.

The best part of the day was coming down the hill after the climb.  I averaged over 40 miles per hour for 9 miles straight, which is most definitely a record for me.  It is an unbelievable feeling riding down a mountain on a bicycle.  Not only is the speed an adrenaline rush, the sense of accomplishment that comes with having ridden over a mountain, a huge freaking mountain, is indescribable.

My fingers are killing me because I am typing this on my cell phone because we do not have internet in this motel.  It's like we are staying in 1985.  Despite the lack of technology here, the resataurant adjacent to our internet void makes an incomprable banana merengue pie.  Between the pie and the rice krispy treats that I couldnlt stop gnawing on I think I gained back all of the calories I burned pedaling up the mountain.  Tomorrow should be fun seeing as we get to go to Royal Gorge which boasts the highest suspension bridge in the world (pictures to follow tomorrow).

Ok, I really can't take any more tapping on this cell phone.  These things were not made for this and I think I'm losing feeling in my thumbs so I'm going to stop before it is permanent.  By the way, the funky picture of the store with all the antlers was of a store that buys antlers and sells them.  The entrepreneureal spirit is alive and strong in Gunnison, Colorado.

Rocky Mountain High

We technically rode through the Sawatch mountain range today, but if you see a mountain in Colorado the first thing you think of is the Rockies. All day I had John Denver's "Rocky Mountain High" playing in my head. That helped to pass the time as I sat on the side of the road waiting for riders to pass by in need of water or snacks. I did achieve one of my small goals for this trip, which was to take a picture of myself with a wild animal. I settled for a cow because it was the closest I could get. Squirrels and prairie dogs are just too dam fast and the wild horses and bears would just not cooperate.

I heard an amazing story today. One of our riders is riding to raise money for his brother who has cerebral palsy. Chris, the one riding for his brother, came upon a cyclist participating in the Bicycle Tour of Colorado who has CP. The guy was inspiring. He had a hard time holding his bike on the road, but he was on the last day of the tour, and cycles regularly. Chris was telling me about this guy and later, as we drove up the road, we passed Mike, the rider with CP. I tooted the horn of the van, cheered him on, and gave him a big thumbs up. It reminded me that people have phenomenal capacity.

Today was rather slow, but beautiful. We rode through the Gunnison Valley and trailed along the Gunnison River. I feel like an idiot every time I realize the most obvious things, but I can see why the Rocky Mountains are named "Rocky", because they have lots of sheer cliff with exposed rock. They are rocky, just like the Red River is red, well, kinda brownish. I haven't been to Half Dome but from pictures I can gather why it is called that. Tomorrow we climb over the Monarch Pass which tops out at over 11,000 feet. We are in mountain territory now. I really hope I can get a picture of me with a moose or a big horn sheep. Even if I don't, I still have my cow.

The Local News and Cherries. Mmmmmmmm, Cherries...

I love watching the local news in smaller towns. Watching the news in major metropolitan areas is what has been called "info-tainment", meaning the news is supposed to inform you, but the news stations also need to sell ad space, so the news they report must draw viewers. In these small towns the news is just hilarious. I turned on the news here in Montrose, Colorado and the lead story was how local cherry farms are having a great cherry season and cherry sales are the highest they have been in ten years. The second story was how Dan Talbach's prize winning garden is not going to be on display this summer because of the unusually wet spring.

The local news I am accustomed to tells everyone to be on high alert because there is a storm on it's way and it could dump nearly an inch of rain over a week. You have guys with names like Johnny Mountain and Dallas Raines who have ridiculous looking fake tans, giving you the latest radar readings and forecast from the Doppler seven million. To top it off, every story is about how someone either got killed, is dying, or what new disease, danger zone, or catastrophic anomaly can kill you. If you honestly got scared from everything you heard on the news I am used to, you wouldn't leave the house.

Neither media format is very informative, but if I had my choice, I would want the more optimistic, local blend. Maybe I will start up my own news network and only report on cats in trees and old ladies who win pie baking contests.

I got to ride the bike today as we shared the road with 2000 other cyclists. We happened to have our ride from Grand Junction to Montrose on the same day and same route as the Bicycle Tour of Colorado. It was a bit weird to look around and see an endless stream of people on bikes, especially since it was on a state highway and in the middle of nowhere. One thing about huge groups of cyclists on these tours is that there is always one guy who is 75 years old, wearing sandals, and just flying by people. I don't know what they feed that geezer but he was just hammering.

I have been trying to stray off the path at least once a day and talk to a local person and today I met Dan Young from Olathe, Colorado. Dan has a winery and orchard in Olathe and is the third generation in his family to run the place. I also met Dan's dog Astro, who picked his head when we approached, but wanted nothing more to do with us. We talked for a little and as the guys sipped some wine, I wandered around and found fresh cherries. Dan said to help myself so I picked a few and sweet merciful crap, they were un-freaking-believable. I must have eaten a pound. I'm not even much of a cherry eater, but these were a small taste of heaven. If you ever happen to be in Olathe in mid June, stop by and try some cherries. I'll probably being dreaming of those cherries tonight mmmmmmmm, cherries....

Did You Know...

Did you know that celery is such a low calorie food that if you were to eat just celery you would die from starvation because you actually burn more calories chewing and digesting celery than you get from eating it? As Sean, one of the riders on the trip, said, though, you would most likely die from boredom before starvation if you only ate celery. I ate some celery today...I didn't feel anything, but then again I guess starvation takes a while to set in, but what do I know, I'm not a doctor.

Today we had nowhere to go and all day to get there. We rode the 97 miles from Green River, Utah, to Grand Junction, Colorado. Grand Junction is the meeting point for the Colorado and Green Rivers. I also learned that the Colorado is also known as the Red River. We rode along side the river for a few miles and after looking at it for a while I think that it should be called the Brown River, because it is brown, but, again, what the hell do I know?

We are now in our fourth state on this cycle adventure and I must say that each state has such an unbelievably distinct landscape. It is as if nature knew where each border was cut and decided to tweak the scenery just enough for it to be unique to each state. Riding out of Utah was mostly desert until the last mile or so where it starts to gradually become more green. As you cross into Colorado there is increasingly more green and the mountainous backdrop converts from the Uinta Mountain range in Utah, which looks like someone scraped the normal cone shaped mountain top off to leave a flat, plateau, to the San Juan Mountains in Colorado, which are a traditional, cone shaped, majestic looking mountain range.

Oh, that's right, I have to vent a bit about the crappy I-70. Today I rode my bicycle and I changed 6 flat tires. The only caveat was that I did not have any flats myself. While I am on the road, it is my job to help the riders with any mechanical problems that may arise, and flat tires are included in that. There are these little pieces of wire that suck. Between cursing and sweating, I stopped and had to laugh that a piece of wire that weigh a fraction of a gram can completely halt a 200 pound man on his bike. I am hoping that tomorrow those little wires will not be a problem, and that I can get a better song stuck in my head. Today I kept singing Elton John's "Rocket Man" which is a perfectly fine song, but 5 hours of it was a little much. When I get a song stuck in my head it speeds up and slows down based on how fast I go. I am going to try to get some Jimi Hendrix stuck tomorrow, we will see how it goes though.

Hot Tea

In 2007 I had the amazing opportunity, given to me by the amazing Brit, to go to China. China is one of the most interesting places that I have been to. Brit found this amazing deal with a tour group through the Chico Chamber of Commerce that included all of our meals, hotels, and tours while we were in China. We ate an obscene amount of Chinese food, although I guess anything we eat while in China would be considered Chinese food, but I digress. At dinner every night we were given the choice of water (with no freaking ice), 7up, or tea. I tried drinking water, but after the tiny cup of water we were given, which never got refilled, I went for the tea, which was refilled constantly. I swear, they refilled the tea after every sip it seemed like. Anyway, my whole point to this is to establish that while I was in China I developed a liking for tea. I am not sure if I like tea, or if I have just built up a tolerance and now I drink it to make me feel sophisticated.

Either way, I am now a tea drinker. This has been great during the winter, when it is cold and I need to warm up from the inside out. On days like today, however, it is a nuisance. I try to multi-task, so while I was sipping my ridiculously hot tea, I was moving equipment in and out of the van with one hand, and delicately holding my tea with the other. I don't know what in my little pea brain makes me think that this feat is possible, but every time I try to do something while I have blazing hot tea in my hand the same result occurs; I end up fighting back tears while my hand sizzles from the tea that has spilt on it. Today was no different. While I moved some bananas, my hand tilted and cooked my hand to a nice medium-rare pink. I yelped.

After I nursed my hand back to health, which included pouting, fanning my hand, and jumping up and down, I started to rethink my tea drinking. Luckily I made it through the whole ordeal, which was nice because the rest of the day was quite beautiful. We had a short ride today which landed us in Green River, Utah. Green River happens to be about a 30 minute drive from Arches National Park. Pictures will not do this natural beauty justice, but I posted them anyway. Arches is one of the most majestic sites I have seen.

The only thing I can even compare it to is the Grand Canyon, but it still has it's own unique elegance that really can not be compared. Tomorrow we cross into another state as we leave Utah and head into the Rocky Mountain state of Colorado.